Commissary Questions? Ask Deputy Johnson

Blast Zone No. 18
Set Up On:
Category: Corrections - Jail Staff
Last Known Jail Location:
901 Port Avenue
St Helens, Oregon 97051
Commissary Questions? Ask Deputy Johnson
Deputy Johnson - Commissary Liason

Deputy Johnson hates being asked about commissary sheets so much it is just too fun to ask him just to see if he will flip out on you. I even put up a sign in the unit at one point to trick new inmates into asking him. The sign said "Commissary Questions: Ask Deputy Johnson." Sure enough someone asked him about commissary sheets and he fired back something typical like "does it look like I work for Aramark? I am a Sheriff's deputy." He got so sick of me asking him that eventually he threatened to put me in the hole if I asked him again.

So, if you end up in the Columbia County Jail be on the lookout for Deputy Johnson and ask him about commissary sheets. Also, he does not usually wear glasses and the last time I saw him his head was shaved.

7/19/2019 - Congratulations! You won the last round Johnson. Not only was there no sign of you the entire time I was back at CCJ in 2018, but the commissary sheets had been replaced with kiosks. Had you simply shown your face I would have found something about the commissary to ask you about, but no, you had to rig the game so that I couldn't ask you anything at all.
1/30/2017 - This is one of those posts that I added to diversify the content a bit. There are a lot of horrible stories on this site, but this is not one of them. This site can be used to call out misconduct, voice an opinion, or just entertain people. I'm not trying to cause Johnson any real grief with this, but it is a funny story and that is why it is here.

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