San Antonio Officer Matthew Luckhurst Sacked for Shit Sandwich

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Former San Antonio Police officer Matthew Luckhurst lost his latest bid to get his job back this past week. Luckhurst was fired for a pair of 2016 incidents involving feces. In one incident he took a dump in a women's restroom and smeared some dookie on the seat. In another incident he gave a homeless man a shit sandwich. He got one of the suspensions overturned last year for not being brought within 180 days, but the second one stands. Attorneys for the city of San Antonio have said that no one wants him back.

In part deux of his arbitration hearings detective Jessica Medrano described walking in on the only women's toilet in that restroom only to find it full of diarrhea with some deer pellets on the seat. She was 8 months pregnant. When she threatened to leave another officer cleaned it up for her. Luckhurst has never explained what he was doing with deer pellets on his person while on duty. What kind of person carries deer pellets with them?

In another incident, Luckhurst gave a homeless man a shit sandwich. The sandwich has been described by some as a discarded tray covered with bread and feces. Luckhurst argued in his defense that he gave it to the man to throw away and not eat it. That might make sense if it were not for incident number two. When he dropped the deuce in the women's restroom and covered the toilet with deer pellets he proved that he plays with poop. In prison, a person that plays with poop is given a bad jacket similar to the jacket of a sex offender because anyone that plays with poop is considered a weirdo. Who wants to live or work with someone that plays with poop?

Maybe if Luckhurst can get his shit together someday he can hold a job where he is less likely to be tempted by his fetishes.

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